Amira

On Wednesday 30 January, Amira did her usual jump off the first floor balcony of our flat to go out to hang with the other cats in the neighbourhood.

She never came back.

The realisation that she has gone and will never be back to rub against my legs, sit on my lap, squeesh on my side when I sleep or just drive me insane, has hit me today.

I know a lot of people get exasperated by us cat ladies but hey when you are single and lonely, your pets fill that void. There is nothing better than coming home to be greeted by your cats. They are like our children without the answering back.

I’ve lost one of mine and its awful. Worse than losing the 5 goldfish I had when I was a kid. My parents saw her recently and are sad. It’s like they lost one of their grand kids. They even used to Skype to each other 🙂

Maybe a miracle might happen and she will return but I don’t have much faith.

To my darling princess. I love you and miss you xxxx

Ps: to @mich1mich for finding Amira over 2 years ago when she was a few weeks old. @esperanca for naming her and being her godmother :). To @toffeeprincess, @mita56 and @kangayayaroo for sharing the flyer to find her and you lot who gave your support and love and didn’t call me a silly cat lady. Xx

Update (12 Feb 2013): it seems that Dubai Municipality are taking cats from areas if they are not wearing the DM, tag even if they have a collar on and are microchipped. I have tried to call but not surprisingly, no one is answering. I may try and visit the Khawaneej office but I have been informed that they are euthanising the cats after 3 days of capture. If you are ever in the same situation as me call 04 289 1114  immediately to try and see if DM were doing a capturing program in your area.

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Proud to be a Brit

I finally watched the Queen’s speech a few hours late. Missed watching the speech on time and eating the Roast with the family. Not being home for Christmas day was horrible as always but that’s the trial of being an expat.

On another note, it is not often that us Brits are nationalistic (unless they are a member of UKIP or whatever that hateful group are called), but 2012 was the year to be proud of being British. I was home for the Olympics and I was in complete shock at the kindness, niceness and all round cool Britishness everywhere. It was an amazing time and my family and I were fortunate to see two events and feel the atmosphere especially when Usain Bolt and Mo Farrah got gold in front of us.

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When you are an expat you are more nationalistic than when you are at home, but I think the events this year brought us together like no other and hopefully it will stay with us for a long time.

For your viewing pleasure, here is the Queen’s Christmas Day speech 2012 and if you didn’t see her jump out of a helicopter, youtube it now! .

Delhi, Rape and Social Media

Dear Social Media bandwagon folk,

I note that you are showing your disgust at the gang rape recently. It is a heinous and disgusting crime and the culprits should be arrested and tried under the Courts in Delhi.

I have a question… how does your status updates on Facebook and Tweets/Retweets help bring justice and bring a change to the epidemic that seems to have hit this city.

Are you:

a. petitioning the State government to change the laws if required and to speed the process for dealing with rapists.

b. insisting that rape kits are available in all hospitals and clincs throughout the state and country. 

c. raising the need for all police forces to be trained and educated to deal with rape cases and educating them that no man should ever rape a woman ever. No matter how she dresses.

d. demanding the education of the public and especially men from a young age that rape is not acceptable and will not be condoned at any time.

e. telling the government to fund schools to have compulsory self defence classes for all female students

What are you doing exactly other than status update? There seems to be a lot of hot air blowing around and no proper action to resolve this issue. 

The same applies for any other country which seems to be acting ridiculously with regards to rape matters.

If there is a way to petition and/or try and do something to solve this matter please let me know.

Kind regards

Shelo9

The Book

A funny thing happened today … I bought a book. A paper book.

 

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It’s been a while since I have bought a proper book. Like a lot of people I now buy e-books; due to convenience and pricing. This book caught my eye as I walked to the hidden lift that’s in this bookshop in dubai mall. I’m a big fan of the sartorialist and have often tweeted pictures from the site that I have adored. I knew the book was out but was not on my must have list but seeing this front cover (there are different covers for this edition of the book), it engaged me.

On picking up the book I saw the penguin symbol and my heart melted. Penguin books and I have had a long love affair from when I was a child. Their books seem to calm me, engage me and feel so nice to the hand.

The book has limited words but the pictures are sublime. I am reminded once again of the endless possibilities of people and style by seeing these pictures. In a city that is predominately one dimensional, I need a reminder every so often to show myself to not be like the others. My styling is typically classic but with random hints of craziness to remove me from being monotone.

The book is now read and resting on my coffee table but I predict it will be dog-eared in a few months time.

The beauty of a paper book…

Brilliant article in Pan Arabia – there are a few expats like this!

New Dubai expat looking forward to writing her ‘tell-all’ exposĂ© about life in the sand

Samantha Higgenbottom says The Daily Mail has agreed to serialise her Dubai sob story should her husband leave her

DUBAI: Within seconds of stepping off the plane at Dubai International Airport to start her new life as an expat in the UAE, English housewife Samantha Higgenbottom says she was already planning her ‘tell all’ book about life in the Emirates.

“From the very first glance out of the plane window I could tell that here was an exotic land filled with mystery and intrigue,” she tells The Pan-Arabia Enquirer while supping a Starbucks’ cafĂ© latte in the Dubai Mall. “And I just knew that it would be packed full of enough eye-raising secrets to fill a dazzling exposĂ© that would lift the lid on what it’s really like.”

Higgenbottom, 39, who has now been living in the city for a week with her hedge fund manager Darren and two cats, Misty and Pebbles, says she is yet to actually unearth any sensational stories worth telling, but is confident they’re just around the corner.

“Who knows what might happen. Perhaps I’ll befriend a group of well-connected women and we’ll spend our days shopping in designer boutiques and evenings drinking Dom Perignon aboard enormous yachts or inside vast palaces owned by chivalrous Arab billionaires who will fly us there by helicopter or drive us in their Maseratis,” she smiles, adding that she’d already bought a small notebook to jot down everything she’d witness.

“Or maybe my husband will leave me and I can write a heart-wrenching narrative about how it was the temptations of Dubai that lured him away. And don’t worry, I won’t be leaving out any of the details!”

Higgenbottom claims that the UK’s Daily Mail newspaper has already expressed an interest in serialising her story should she separate from her husband. “They’ve asked me to start compiling a selection of photos of us in happier times,” she laughs. “I’ve even got a photographer coming this weekend.”

Although not a single word of her gripping real-life Dubai-based drama has been written, Higgenbottom admits she hasn’t been wasting any time in coming up with potential titles.

“Obviously it might have to change depending on the content, but I’ve got a few ideas I quite like, including ‘Secrets Beneath The Sand’, ‘Divas of the Dunes’, ‘Dubai My Lover’, you know, like the James Blunt song, and ‘Behind The Veil’,” she says.

In the meantime, while she researches the juicy content for her bestseller, Higgenbottom claims she has another project in the works.

“The other day I noticed just how many restaurants there were in Dubai serving scrummy dishes from around the world, and realised that they was hardly anybody writing about them,” she says. “So I’m now in the final planning stages of setting up a dedicated food blog.”

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DXB part 2

So further to my previous blog today, I thought I would write about my second home..Dubai.

After living here for 7 years I still get asked “why did you move here”. My story was one of fate and my living here as been a twisty path. I came here first in 2003 on holiday with my parents. Friends in the UK were perplexed by the decision to come here. No one had really heard of Dubai in England and they thought it was in Saudi. In 2003, the end of Sheikh Zayed was where the Mall of Emirates now stands. I stayed in Al Quasis and Bur Dubai in hotel apartments. I met my tailor at Dreamgirl who has remained our go to tailor since then.

2 years later I looked for a job outside of England, got a job quite quickly working for the airline here in Dubai as a lawyer and moved here. When I came for my interview George Clooney was filming Syriana and staying at the Fairmont. Burj Dubai (as it was then known) was at foundation level and Dubai Marina was full of cranes and not much else. I moved to a huge flat in Bur Dubai and had dramas after dramas for a year and a half. At that time there was no blogging, twitter or facebook. I wrote 2 page essay emails to about 30 friends every week telling them my stories. Some got bored, some were fascinated and some were exasperated by my tales. However all the tales were the reality of the weirdness of Dubai at the time.

I moved back to London in 2006 to study but the hold of Dubai was too much and I moved back in 2007 to work for a shite company that has now disintergrated. At the time of returning Dubai was exponetially blinging itself on a daily basis. If you left Dubai, you would return the following week to find new buildings had sprouted up on Sheikh Zayed Road.

Then there was the crash. Dubai fell hard and I fell even harder. My money was stolen by two theives who ran off to live the life of riley in the Far East and then back in the UK and I was piss poor for a few years. It was kinda good that Dubai was poor as well, we could suffer together and try not to spend too much money.

Now Dubai is rising again like a phoenix and I am now contently happy with my life here. After living in posh Jumeirah for 5 years, I decided that my kitties and I need to move and explore more of Dubai so now we are away from the beach and in the desert in Motor City.

The chavs that ran away in droves in 2008 leaving their cars at the airport are now encouraging their brethern to come here to make the most of the tax free lifestyle. The roads are blocked again, there are queues to get into bars and copious amounts of money are being spent on champagne in dives such as the Cavalli club.

We now have Twitter, et al to keep us in touch more seamlessly with the rest of the world in real time and people now know that Dubai is not in Saudi and that we don’t dress up like ninjas (unless we go to a fancy dress house party).

Life is the same as anywhere in the world, except when you go to the gym you are more likely to park next to a Ferrari than a Ford Focus and that tea shop in Satwa will be packed full of Sheikhs and Sheikhas beeping their horns for some karak chai. My friends and I discuss the merits of pest control companies and whether the gel stuff can be put in places away from our cats preying mouths (a lot of us have pets here), how many maids should you have in your pad to finish in an hour and we also stand on the slopes of Ski Dubai deciding whether we should go to Lebanon or an ex-CIS country for our Winter snowboarding trip.

This country is a transition country and people come and go. Its a melting pot of people especially fuck ups running away from their own country/people (me included). You will be with one group of people and then you will stupidly date someone in that group and boom you will be outcast if it all goes pete tong. Or a girl will have complexes which result in your being outcast for being you. Finding good friends on the same wavelength and in the same relationship status as you is hard. Once you are coupled up, you are generally coupled up and the singletons (normally me) are left stranded. Lonliness is a huge problem here but luckily there is social media to keep you company on your bad days. Also there is now a travel group – Escpae travels – based here which has brought people together who like travelling around and hanging out with other expats (<a href="https://www.facebook.com/EscapeDubai).

https://www.facebook.com/EscapeDubai).</p>

Tolerance is limited despite the various nationalities here and racism is rife.  Being an English East African Indian working in an Indian company is a minefield of issues and judgements which still arise after 3 years of working there. I am vilified by the Indian men (especially the men) for not accepting my background. Considering my grandparents never returned to India once leaving in the early 1900’s and my parents only went once for a holiday, you’d think they would get into their thick head how people can be un-Indian (thats a word for today); but nope the Indians in this country take it as an offence that we would not consider ourselves Indian foremost.

The other minefield is the varoius Arab nationalities in this melting pot. Everyone in this country are now bloody experts in Arabic politics especially since the Arab Spring. We can all sprout an opinion on what is going on in the region and can even tell the nationality of the Arab men in their kundoora depending on the colour of their headscarf. I personally have an affiliation for the Emirati; they look more regal than the Saudis (yuck), Yemeni (not bad), Omani (old skool Mombasa like), Bahraini, Kuwaitis, etc.

Food is abundant from expensive, American chains and dirt cheap indians. If you want to eat any cuisine, it will be here. Bread is always a disappointment for Europeans but the rest is generally amazing. I have been to Nobu twice here but never in the UK and I won’t go to Hakassan as i thought it was shite in London. The best Indian food is not at the chain called “Asha’s” but in Karama or in Bur Dubai. My personal favourites are Gazebo (North Indian) or Ravis (Pakistani). Khaleej Palace Hotel in Deira looks like a dive but has the best Chinese restaurant in my opinion in town, an amazing Japanese resturant and Cafe Entrecote (same as in Dubai Mall) but you can drink in this hotel branch. Dubai Mall and Dubai Festival City have food corridors rather than halls of various good restaurants. However, Dubai Mall has the most shambolic car park system in the world. All Dubaians get pissed off when entering and leaving that place.

Shopping is immense and we get a greater choice as we get all the brands from all over the world. I love Crate and Barrel for furnitues and home stuff, but we also have the stalwart Ikea (bigger than at home) and a shop called The One which is a local enterprise which has really good (slightly overpriced stuff). Clothes shops – we have it all but pay more than back in Europe so most of us will go home a few times of the year with an empty suitcase, fill it up and claim our VAT back. The only shop not here is Primark which is great so we look different from the herd when wearing Primarni in the malls, bars and clubs.

Entertainment is great here. We have bars and clubs (most of the clubs are a disappointment though). The major artists come here or to Abu Dhabi for concerts. I go to Yas Marina island just on the outskirts of Abu Dhabi  to see concerts every few months. Despite being an F1 fan I never saw a live race until it came to Abu Dhabi. I’ve now seen it every year (except the first year). David Guetta is here every week practically which is great for us (not!) and we get to see other artists who I would never have seen back home, such as Bikram Ghosh, a fusion tabla player who I saw last night. He knew how to use those fingers and the young man on the electrical stitar was bloody awesome.Plays and operas are pretty dire here but a good friend went to Muscat, Oman, last weekend to go to the Opera house and gave it a huge thumbs up review. With cheap flights and being an hour away I would be happy going to Muscat to see good opera. Comedy is not bad with an improv group here and also the top ones from the Comedy Club/Edinburgh Festival coming here every month.

I could go on with my guide of Dubai but I’ll stop for now. Our weekend is nearly over (Friday and Saturday is our weekend here) and I gotta get prepared for another long week of working. Also I really don’t want to become like those annoying bloggers who blabber on and on and on.  So for now here is an abrupt end to a new chapter in my writing (until i meet another douchebag).

 

Dxb

I have come to the conclusion in the last few days that I must write more about Dubai and the UAE, where I have lived for the last 7 years. Things I might think are normal now are not normal in the real world and you should be alerted to the craziness that I’m surrounded by.

The blog has been mostly about men and it must be a dull subject for you now. So starting from today ill be telling you more about what goes on in my normal life here. It’s never dull if I’m honest. 🙂

From Europhia to Lonliness in short sharp bursts…

Men are everywhere. Some are cute, some are psycho, some are goddamn minging and some are gay.

Very few come within my radar due to me being too scary, minging in their eyes, not Indian enough, not English enough or too girlie which is shocks them.

There are moments when they suddenly step into my radar and give me some attention. Then they realise im not the strong willed woman they were imaginging in their head and they run away.

This seems to be a recurring thing. I don’t have to say much. I don’t have to do much. I just act like me and poof they run away again.

The other weekend I got attention far exceeding anything before, from an old crush. He spent a few days reassuring me he wasnt messing around with my heart and mind and was sincere. He has known me for years, since me being scary lawyer like at work, and calm gentle lady in private. He accepts my analness as part of my character and laughs at my moments of silliness.

However, last night he freaked out. Today nothing (he has this knack of ignoring my existence if he doesn’t like the image i’m portraying to him at any given time).

Now i’m back to being unhappy, lonely and unforgiving on myself. Once again I let a retard into my life for a short moment of europhia. It’s like a drug that makes you high and then its taken away from you and the come down is more painful than five injections on your body.

I wonder if there is a pill that can cure my stupidity when it comes to men. Or if God will stop punishing me and bring me a man who can accept my words, faults and occasional blondness. For now I am wallowing until I can find something or someone to cheer me up again.

Escape to Istanbul

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One of the non awesome things about living in the UAE is the loneliness. You leave your friends and family to start a life of working and occasionally playing. The cities especially Abu Dhabi and Dubai are transition towns. The majority come here to make lots of tax free money, play around, top up their tan and then go back or forward around the world. One minute you have a group of friends and the next poof you are sitting alone in your big apartment writing a blog.

Being solo most of the time results in me either going home to England to see my family and friends (and shopping of course) or holidaying solo as I have done on numerous occasions (Copenhagen, Australia and Japan were a few of the solo trips). It’s not awful and it makes you a stronger person but you sometimes need someone to talk to other than yourself and those voices.

Miraculously, there are other people who are like me and light has come to the tunnel of holidaying by way of a company called Escape Travels. Set up by a dude named Fajer he has organised holidays in the Middle East, Asia and Europe for like minded individuals mostly solo who want to explore places near the UAE and meet cool people. My lovely mate Mr C told me about the group after he had been to Lebanon for skiing, India and very recently Ethiopia so I thought I would give it a try.

 

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Luckily the first trip that came up was to Istanbul, which is somewhere I have always wanted to go. As is normal with me, I went all spontaneous and booked the flights and trip within half an hour of seeing it online and bada bing I was going on a holiday with a bunch of strangers. Mr C introduced me to a few of the peeps who were going on the trip the weekend before which was good so when I saw them at the airport I wasn’t a complete shy loser.

There were 27 in the group including Fajer with people ranging in ages and backgrounds. We did do a count of the nationalities (which I cant remember) but it was a large motely mix. Unbelievably there was only one English dudess and it was me! :). Of course there were a few people you don’t want to see again let alone add on your Facebook, but the majority were lovely down to earth peeps out for exploring the city and enjoying themselves.

We stayed in Sultanahmet which is the old town and supposedly in the European bit of Istanbul (which was weird to acknowledge but ok). You couldn’t swing a cat in the hotel room and it was very basic but supposedly all hotels in the area are like that.

With the help of two lovely guides (ok the man asked if I was pregnant so not that lovely :S) we got to see the Blue Mosque (did u know the Turkish don’t call it the Blue Mosque only tourist do), Topaki Palace (which houses Moses’s cane and Prophets Muhammad’s (pbuh) footmark) and also Hagamet Sofia (formerly a church and mosque and now a museum of sorts).

Tip no 1 – If you go to the Blue Mosque and you want to pray the ablutions/wudu area is on the right hand side down the stairs and underneath them sort of. I asked five people and walked around like a crazy woman till I accidentally found the damn place. Also the area for women to pray was full of twit women lounging about and not moving out of the way so not the best experience when praying but hey at least I  did it.

Afterwards a few of us went to a rug shop to spend copious amounts of money on proper rugs. Tip no 2 – the dodgy b’s at the grand bazaar rug shops and even in Dubai will claim you are buying a silk rug when most probably you are buying cotton on cotton rug. Check the label, the feel and whether it changes colour when looking from one side of the rug to the other. There are other tips but that is all I can give you on this blog. Just be careful and spend a bit more if you can for a proper made rug.

The Grand Bazaar was bazaar. It was full of tourists and lots of Turkish shopkeeper men who could turn from charmers to vicious snakes in one second. I had one shopkeeper start ranting at me and then told me to go “F myself” when I walked away from his skanky looking magnets. It was so strange a response that all I could do was look baffled. Even the blokes neighbor shop keepers were stunned by the reaction. If you shop around the outskirts of the bazaar its quieter and you get a nicer  service.

However, if you can resist going to the Grand Bazaar I would recommend you bypass it and go the spice bazaar which was smaller, quieter and nicer. Also they had lovely spices, organic soaps and bits and pieces. Also if you are at the spice bazaar walk near by and you will get to the pet market and garden market which were totally unusually! I have been to many markets but never seen anything like these markets. (That was tip numero 3)

We also went on a boat and cruised around the Bosphorous checking out the big bridge, seeing Asian Istanbul and European Istanbul and some beautiful houses by the waterfront. The view was spectacular and being UAEians (yes that is a new word) we had a boat all to ourselves. We couldn’t mingle with the public you know.

 

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Another great trip was going to Galatea Tower to see the sunset. The walk was painful especially up the steep hill to the tower but the view was lovely and afterwards we could see in the square drinking and sitting in circles with the other hippy Turkish people singing. It was so refreshing to just chill out in public and not be worried about our silliness resulting in arrest.

Eating and drinking was cheap. On the last night we went to a good restaurant  and spent less than 20 quid on a main meal, dessert and drink. Of course there was also the beautiful bakeries with baklava, Turkish delights and Turkish coffee to taste and savour.

 

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Being with a group I could also go out at night and enjoy the nightlife without worrying about being alone as a woman. We went to the area, which is full of shops (which are open till very late), bars and restaurants. The group had split after eating at the restaurant on the last night but somehow a lot of us ended up back together in this open roof club dancing to euro tunes that I have not heard (I’m a bit behind in my euro pop music right now). The great thing about Turkey like in Dubai is that the music is a mixture of western, Turkish and Arabic music.

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The final trip for me was to a Turkish Hammam. The hotel guy and coffee shop next door guy were trying to get us to go to their respective hammam’s. We eventually went with the hotel guy and his affiliated hammam, just so we could come back and check out later without any hassle. The hammam was old school but not up to sparkling cleanliness standards as you get in Dubai. I got to walk around butt naked (its liberating for a western like me! the other ladies were a bit more prudish!), scrubbed to the inch of my skin and massaged like I was a rag doll. Not the most comfortable experience but an experience nonetheless. If you can, try and go to one in a big hotel. If that’s not possible, just take it onboard as an experience and that it wont be as pristine as the Ladies Club in Dubai or Elizabeth Arden in London.

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Of course 3 days is not enough to see this huge city but it was a good taster to build on.  Being with the cool crew was good as I made new friends to meet up with in the UAE and got to enjoy and share my holiday with other people which was refreshingly nice. I highly recommend you get your arse to Istanbul and if you can go with a group even better.

Going with Escape Travels was awesome and saved the hassle of organizing yourself and if you are a normal person you get to meet other normal people. If you are interested go to:

http://escape-travels.com/home/about

Or the FB page

https://www.facebook.com/EscapeDubai